Ngala-Najla

I Celebrate Myself…

Meet Me At the Crossroads

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I began this blog entry two weeks ago, and did not publish it. Honestly, I do not know what the heck I was trying to say:

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only things that ever has.” –Margaret Mead

I have been contemplating not going to law school after grad school. This has been on my mind for quite some time–months. I have never been one to just do something for prestige or wealth. I honestly want to be equipped with the tools necessary for me to make a difference in this world. Although this may seem a bit idealistic, blame it on my years at City Year. Now the questions plague me: am I making the right decision? Will this decision affect me years from now? Will it be enough?

I am enjoying the thought of not going to law school. To be honest, all along I felt as if going to law school was something I was forcing myself to do; it was expected of me to do it. I think because I started telling people that I was planning on going to law school, and then it made me feel as if I had to follow through on my word, blame that on being a Girl Scout!

In addition to following through on my word, I have counteracted that thought with how much money I will be spending on something I am not sure of. Maybe I should rephrase that sentence: …how much money I will be owing on something I am not sure of.

I have also been attending forums in Washington, DC on international affairs and immigrant rights, for my internship, and I want to get my hands dirty so to speak. A lot of the people involved in this area do not have law degrees and are making a huge impact. More selfishly, I find myself visiting websites for institutions offering courses in Spanish , something I have always wanted to improve; I can see myself taking these classes next summer. I think about being able to spend a lot of time in Borders or this nice used books store I found in Silver Spring–not having to rush home, because I have to study.

The thing is, when I decided on going back to school, for social work, I knew that was what I was suppose to do– there was no doubt about it. I just want to be as certain for the next stage in my life. I am open to anything. I believe that the Universe, God sends you signs that if you pay attention to them, will lead you to the right path. Insha Allah ( God Willing), I will have the wisdom and the courage to pay attention.

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Author: ngalanjala

I Have Learned So much from God That I can no longer Call Myself A Christian, a Hindu, a Muslim, A Buddhist, a Jew. The Truth has shared so much of Itself With me That I can no longer call myself A man, a woman, an angel, Or even pure Soul. Love has Befriended Hafiz so completely It has turned to ash And freed Me Of every concept and image My mind has ever known. ~ Hafiz ~

One thought on “Meet Me At the Crossroads

  1. i felt the same way, but i was already in a program and felt the need to finish it. thing is, when i initially went into the program i was all gung-ho about it. now in this stage of my life — raisin’ children — i wish i had done something else. ma sha’ Allah.

    i agree with you: go with what your mind and heart tell you. doing something like that for the sake of other’s opinions of you will only make it feel like a burden instead of a joy.

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