Ngala-Najla

I Celebrate Myself…


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Untitled

Slow down
Do not haste
For I need parts of you to be still
So that I can figure things out

I do not need to be reminded by calendars
And unfinished tasks
Of how much of you I have wasted

With you buzzing by
With my mind often joining you in motion
I become dizzy and confused

Wait, stay here with me
Show me what you have taught others
Who did not take heed to your power
I wish not to be like them

How were my ancestors?
Did they regard you as friend or foe?
Did they eventually make sense of it all
And used you to advance themselves?

Sometimes they speak to me
In dreams
They always seem to be in a space where there is no mention of you
Dancing endlessly as if there is no task, no calendar to remind them of your fleeting presence.

Time, here all that means nothing
You are present yet constantly moving
And I find that I yearn to find some balance with the whirling stillness of you
Not winning nor losing to your power but being — taking no part of you for granted.

Copyright © RNLH 2010


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When You Can Endure

It is the day after Thanksgiving Day and although there hasn’t been anything that has jumped into my mind as to what I should be really, really thankful for, there is a list of things that I know for which I am grateful: life, a sound mind, shelter, family, etc. I do not take any of these things lightly. Some days I am less thankful than the others, but on days when I am in my “woe is me” stage, I am reminded (sometimes immediately, and sometimes eventually) about the many blessings that I have .

Lately, there are things that have happened that in a lot of ways are forcing me to be conscious of the simple things. Sometimes I get caught up and begin to act as if I am the only one going through emotional pain or challenges, but the reality is we are never alone, especially in our grief or pain. More importantly, we are never alone especially in our return to triumph and happiness.

I visited a bookstore in my neighborhood last week and went straight to the poetry section, I needed to read things from authors whose words soothed my soul and I came across a collection of Hafiz’s poems entitled, The Gift, and the first poem that I opened up to was:

                                       When You Can Endure

 

When the words stop
And you can endure the silence
That reveals your heart’s pain
of emptiness
Or that great wrenching-sweet longing,
That is the time to try and listen
To what the Beloved’s
Eyes
Most want
To
Say.

 

Need to say no more.


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Inward

“You can explore the universe, looking for somebody who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and you will not find that person anywhere.”
                                                                   – Buddha
 
Where have I been? It has been some time that I have typed words with the intention of turning them into complete sentences and paragraphs. The fall is here and winter is soon to be upon us.  Nature is slowing down and is soon to retreat. I guess I am doing some retreating of my own. I felt compelled to post that quote above by Buddha. No sure if it will connect to what I am writing about in the body of this post, but maybe it will.
 
I have spent some time trying to figure stuff out and trying to find extra meaning in things. The truth is we can only try our best. We have to learn, I have to learn that there are things that will be and forgiveness is necessary, acceptance is mandatory and change is constant. Being okay with uncertainty empowers one to stay grounded.
It  is November, to shed, to release, to withdraw in tempting. The desire to become anew is acknowledged.
 
Yesterday I listened to a great stanza from Leaves of Grass that I feel emdodies more of what I am trying to articulate. Here a man with a very robust voice reads. I hope it speaks to you in some way.
Be Well.